My friend had just finished telling me about her guy problems and I can’t help but think, “Why do feelings exists and why do we date while in college?” I understand that it’s so hard to control your feelings especially if you do like someone, but why?
I’m not saying I don’t date but sometimes I do sit there and wonder why I put myself through relationships at this point in my life when I’m so devoted to my education and so focus on my schooling; and especially because I really don’t know where it’s going. Whenever I date someone, I don’t ever think about the future, I don’t sit and ponder about spending the rest of my life with that particular person because there is obviously no way to tell whether you are going to marry this person or not.
If I don’t know whether I’m going to be with someone in the future or not, why do I have date people? So then because I’m so young should I just blow off every relationship that could’ve or should’ve happened with me and another individual since our future is obviously so mysterious?
It’s funny that I think that but I don’t act it. In the back of my mind these questions are always floating around but in the past I still I put myself through relationships that always resulted in a breakup.
I guess I can never really answer those questions and that’s why all I can do is live in the moment and let the future be a surprise to not only me but everyone else who ever ponder about why we date people at a young age and at the stage of our lives.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Sunday, November 15, 2009
flu shot gone wrong
It was just recently that heard about this poor girl whose life was horribly altered by a simple flu shot. I am not sure exactly what happened but apparently the flu shot she got some how damaged her nerves and disabled her from being able to talk or walk normally the way she used to. She is now only able to speak with out stuttering uncontrollably if she was walking backward or running. If she wants to be able to move without any jerking motions she would have to either run or walk backward as well. It’s though she is able to do everything normally by walking backward or running.
When I heard about this, I thought to myself "what a poor girl." Some people are just so unlucky, I mean so many people every year gets the flu shot, but it seems like one out of a million would have to go through something that horrible like the that girl. One out of a million might seem like not much but when you think about it, what if that one person was you? How would you feel? How drastically would your life change?
I know for sure that if that was to happen to me, I would feel like it could happen to just about any body. I would also become very cautious about modern technology and about all the possible risk factors that comes with just about anything. It might sound like I'm being paranoid but after hearing that incident, it only made me believe that anyone's life can change through any small move any second.
When I heard about this, I thought to myself "what a poor girl." Some people are just so unlucky, I mean so many people every year gets the flu shot, but it seems like one out of a million would have to go through something that horrible like the that girl. One out of a million might seem like not much but when you think about it, what if that one person was you? How would you feel? How drastically would your life change?
I know for sure that if that was to happen to me, I would feel like it could happen to just about any body. I would also become very cautious about modern technology and about all the possible risk factors that comes with just about anything. It might sound like I'm being paranoid but after hearing that incident, it only made me believe that anyone's life can change through any small move any second.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
oh boy workloads
I just got back from my last class of the day. It's 3:30 pm and I still have not gotten anything done. I look at my planner and there it listed:
1. Post 5th bog
2. Find two sources for 3rd essay topic and analyze it
3. Read "Writing Paragraphs" in the Writer's Reference
4. Start presentation
5. Start 2nd essay for SAS 30 due Friday
6. Start reviewing for SAS 30 midterm Monday
7. Review Notes for NPB12 and Study for Midterm
8. Work Friday & sat.
So I'm thinking to myself "How in the world will I do all this between now and Sunday." Just when I thought things could not get anymore time consuming, I realized I that I have work right after class on Friday until 11pm and work Saturday morning until 3 pm. Once again, more time had been taken out of my workload time. So as I'm sitting here doing this, it made me think about the paragraph that Kaitlin wrote in class about workloads and working at the same time. I am definitely feeling the pressure now.
I really hope all this fighting for time between work and school will pay off in the future. Then it hit me, what if it does not pay off? What if some how something happens and my life just fall apart?! All the time I spent on working and doing homework will go to waste! It was almost as if I'm having a panic attack.
So I took a deep breath and calmed down. I said to myself "Think positively, don't give up." This was the only think I could do because the future is a mystery and as much as I want to know what will happen, I don't. Though I wished I knew so then if my life is to fall apart I should just give up now- but I can't give up. Because the future is such a mystery, giving up now might just ruin my chance of a better future. So with all that thinking, I came to the conclusion that I am definitely thinking too much and I should just continue to work hard, manage my time and hopefully it will all pay off.
1. Post 5th bog
2. Find two sources for 3rd essay topic and analyze it
3. Read "Writing Paragraphs" in the Writer's Reference
4. Start presentation
5. Start 2nd essay for SAS 30 due Friday
6. Start reviewing for SAS 30 midterm Monday
7. Review Notes for NPB12 and Study for Midterm
8. Work Friday & sat.
So I'm thinking to myself "How in the world will I do all this between now and Sunday." Just when I thought things could not get anymore time consuming, I realized I that I have work right after class on Friday until 11pm and work Saturday morning until 3 pm. Once again, more time had been taken out of my workload time. So as I'm sitting here doing this, it made me think about the paragraph that Kaitlin wrote in class about workloads and working at the same time. I am definitely feeling the pressure now.
I really hope all this fighting for time between work and school will pay off in the future. Then it hit me, what if it does not pay off? What if some how something happens and my life just fall apart?! All the time I spent on working and doing homework will go to waste! It was almost as if I'm having a panic attack.
So I took a deep breath and calmed down. I said to myself "Think positively, don't give up." This was the only think I could do because the future is a mystery and as much as I want to know what will happen, I don't. Though I wished I knew so then if my life is to fall apart I should just give up now- but I can't give up. Because the future is such a mystery, giving up now might just ruin my chance of a better future. So with all that thinking, I came to the conclusion that I am definitely thinking too much and I should just continue to work hard, manage my time and hopefully it will all pay off.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Alterations
Sunday, October 18 2009, I just came back from visiting one of my best friends that I’ve known since the 7Th grade in Pollock Pines. Unlike just any other visit, today we celebrated her 19th birthday. Today was also the day that I got to see her 13 days old son Koby, my god son, for the very first time.
As I wrapped Koby’s diminutive body in my wide open arms, many thoughts filled my mind. I couldn’t believe that just a year ago my two best friends and I were talking about our future and what was going to happen. None of us imagined her, the youngest of us three, to be the first to have a kid. Thinking back to 7Th grade we would’ve never thought about the future this way. It seems like as we get older life only gets more difficult with plenty of new obstacles.
I could only then imagine how hard life is going to get for my friend especially being a teenage mom with only one year of a college education. It almost seems as if her future is set for her; to be a struggling teenage mom. I didn’t want to think the worse for her so I told her that things will get better but in my heart I doubted my own words.
Then I thought that one wrong move could alter my entire future. I was definitely scared, I don’t want to struggle to support myself in future but I didn’t want to have to sit down and plan out my every move just to make sure that I would succeed. I didn’t want to feel like I wasted my entire life by studying and working all the time. I want to be able to have fun, live life, be young while I can but at the same time be successful.
It then came to my senses that all those things could happen. I could have fun, live life and be successful as long as I know how to limit myself and set my priorities straight. I could be successful as long as I work hard and believe in myself. I could party and have fun as long as I don’t do it when I have a midterm, project or final the next day. My life could be perfectly fun and successful as long as I can manage my time and put what’s more important ahead of me.
Then I realized that I was just thinking too much, my friend’s future isn’t set for her; she has her entire life ahead of her. She could still be a successful teenage mom as long as she is willing to work for it. Of course a college education is going to take longer for her but its better late than never. With the help of close friends and families she could definitely be able to support not only herself but Koby. It won’t be easy, but I know she’ll be able to do if she just puts her mind to it.
Watching her and Koby today made me realize that one mistake doesn’t end your life or your future as long as you can get back on track. If school work gets hard, I’ll just have to keep trying or ask for help. If my social life gets a little out of hand, I should just hang on and see it through. Life isn’t an easy ride and everyone hits a bump in the road once in a while. As long as you just keep on going, you’ll get to your designation even if it does take a little longer and this is possible for everyone.
As I wrapped Koby’s diminutive body in my wide open arms, many thoughts filled my mind. I couldn’t believe that just a year ago my two best friends and I were talking about our future and what was going to happen. None of us imagined her, the youngest of us three, to be the first to have a kid. Thinking back to 7Th grade we would’ve never thought about the future this way. It seems like as we get older life only gets more difficult with plenty of new obstacles.
I could only then imagine how hard life is going to get for my friend especially being a teenage mom with only one year of a college education. It almost seems as if her future is set for her; to be a struggling teenage mom. I didn’t want to think the worse for her so I told her that things will get better but in my heart I doubted my own words.
Then I thought that one wrong move could alter my entire future. I was definitely scared, I don’t want to struggle to support myself in future but I didn’t want to have to sit down and plan out my every move just to make sure that I would succeed. I didn’t want to feel like I wasted my entire life by studying and working all the time. I want to be able to have fun, live life, be young while I can but at the same time be successful.
It then came to my senses that all those things could happen. I could have fun, live life and be successful as long as I know how to limit myself and set my priorities straight. I could be successful as long as I work hard and believe in myself. I could party and have fun as long as I don’t do it when I have a midterm, project or final the next day. My life could be perfectly fun and successful as long as I can manage my time and put what’s more important ahead of me.
Then I realized that I was just thinking too much, my friend’s future isn’t set for her; she has her entire life ahead of her. She could still be a successful teenage mom as long as she is willing to work for it. Of course a college education is going to take longer for her but its better late than never. With the help of close friends and families she could definitely be able to support not only herself but Koby. It won’t be easy, but I know she’ll be able to do if she just puts her mind to it.
Watching her and Koby today made me realize that one mistake doesn’t end your life or your future as long as you can get back on track. If school work gets hard, I’ll just have to keep trying or ask for help. If my social life gets a little out of hand, I should just hang on and see it through. Life isn’t an easy ride and everyone hits a bump in the road once in a while. As long as you just keep on going, you’ll get to your designation even if it does take a little longer and this is possible for everyone.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Culture
Today in anthropology discussion we were all supposed to choose a quote from this article by Clifford Greet entitle "The Impact on the Concept of Culture on the Concept of Man" and then write about it. My friend Ray Kishida had chosen a quote that really caught my attention. The quote stated "One of the most significant facts about us may finally be that we all begin with the natural equipment to live a thousand kinds of life but in the end having lived only one."
To me this quote meant, everyone starts of in the world with many different choices and or paths that they could take. Though some people may choose to take the first path together they will ultimately split at another road in their lives. No lives are ever lived the same, no one will ever be just like someone else. There is always something that will distinguish the way one person is compare to another individual.
Take for example, identical twins may look exactly alike and have the exact same sets of chromosomes but the way they think, their opinions, their personalities, and their beliefs are different and that makes them who they are.
Despite how we decided to lives our lives and despite what roads, path and choice we decide to take we are all only given one chance to live one very short but long life. It made me really thought about my future and the choices I have because I really only have this one life to do what I really want to do.
To me this quote meant, everyone starts of in the world with many different choices and or paths that they could take. Though some people may choose to take the first path together they will ultimately split at another road in their lives. No lives are ever lived the same, no one will ever be just like someone else. There is always something that will distinguish the way one person is compare to another individual.
Take for example, identical twins may look exactly alike and have the exact same sets of chromosomes but the way they think, their opinions, their personalities, and their beliefs are different and that makes them who they are.
Despite how we decided to lives our lives and despite what roads, path and choice we decide to take we are all only given one chance to live one very short but long life. It made me really thought about my future and the choices I have because I really only have this one life to do what I really want to do.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
first blog uwp 001
Fifty percent of the time the way i think is ultimately influenced by the way my parents brought me up. I want to say that as a thinker, i am an individual but the truth is my parents did influence my thinking with theirs. I might not agree with everything that they do or all of the beliefs but i can say that with certain things i am absolutely like them. In conclusion, as a thinker my thoughts, opinions and decisions are all influenced by my parents and the environment that i grew up in, including all the struggles that i been through. Therefore, i see my self as a biased thinker at times.
As a writer i feel like there's two sides to me. For example, there's the me who writes in my diary, online private blogs, or journal, then there's me, the writer who writes argumentative essays, stories and blogs for my college courses. What i am trying to say is that, depending on what i am writing for and why, my style as a writer is different although i might still have the same arguments and opinions about that certain matter. For example, if i was writing to express my opinions against abortion for a essay i would say "abortion should be banned because it is just a way to kill legally." On the contrary, if i was writing in my private, anonymous online blogs i would say "why the f**** would this stupid a*** state punish people for killing but allow women to kill their babies." So what i am trying to say is that as a writer, i have many different side.
As a writer i feel like there's two sides to me. For example, there's the me who writes in my diary, online private blogs, or journal, then there's me, the writer who writes argumentative essays, stories and blogs for my college courses. What i am trying to say is that, depending on what i am writing for and why, my style as a writer is different although i might still have the same arguments and opinions about that certain matter. For example, if i was writing to express my opinions against abortion for a essay i would say "abortion should be banned because it is just a way to kill legally." On the contrary, if i was writing in my private, anonymous online blogs i would say "why the f**** would this stupid a*** state punish people for killing but allow women to kill their babies." So what i am trying to say is that as a writer, i have many different side.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)